People are just bolder in Boulder
I’m spending the evening reading new blogs and catching up on my sidebar blogs. No real entry tonight but I had this forwarded to me and living very close to the “Republic of Boulder”, I found it to be hilarious.
I did not write this, it’s from the Boulder Weekly
February 19-25, 2009
Phelps should move to Boulder
You’ve got to pity Michael Phelps. Sure, he’s got more gold medals than there are days of the week. But he’s also got some crappy friends. The dude went to a party, took a couple of bong hits and had the misfortune of being photographed by a so-called friend.
The friend sold the photos to a British tabloid, and Phelps found himself being kicked around in the press by people who feel that he should live like a saint because he’s an Olympic champion.
Since when did winning gold medals mean the public owns you?
It’s time Phelps moved away from those no-good, traitorous friends of his and came to the People’s Republic. Here are 10 reasons he should move to our city:
10. You stay higher longer at altitude. (OK, so maybe that’s an urban myth.)
9. No one here eats Kellogg’s. We prefer classier fare like pizza and burritos to curb those post-ganja munchies.
8. When he’s done smoking mary jane, he can shred Mary Jane.
7. Boulder cops are directed to make busting pot smokers their lowest priority — after jaywalking. So, if someone takes a picture of
you holding a bong and shows it to the cops, the cops don’t give a damn.
6. The **** here is really good — and we have swimming pools.
5. Where else in the world can you get organic, shade-grown Fair Trade Nederland weed?
4. No self-respecting Boulderite would ever think to sell photos of a friend holding a bong to the tabloids, no matter how famous that friend was.
3. In Boulder, even members of City Council toke.
2. The only thing that makes us angry with Phelps is that he apologized rather than standing up and saying, “Yeah, I smoke pot. So the f*ck what?”
1. 4/20 needs a celebrity sponsor.
Funny but it kind of sums up Boulder.
Just for fun I suggest from now on that an overly large bong hit be referred to as a “Phelps”.
If you’re going to be known as the world’s fastest pothead in water you at least deserve a bong hit named after you right?